Learning how to apologize with a card is a good first step onto the apologetic path. There are many reasons why someone may feel remorseful, but each apology boils down to crucial points that are fairly universal for various apology situations.
Enter this article on how to apologize with a card with a clear and open mind, and you’ll feel lighter than before you started. And very much ready to write a sincere apology card for the person you have in mind.
“The hero isn’t the one who is right, but the one who steps forward to take the blame—deserved or not—and apologize to save a relationship.”
-Richelle E. Goodrich
How to Write an Apology Card
Writing an apology card that is filled with genuine remorse and a proper extension of an apologetic hand starts with accepting your wrongful doing and the situation.
It’s easier said than done to admit, not only to yourself but expressing out loud, that you’ve done something wrong. But taking ownership of your wrongful actions/words sooner rather than later is the absolute best way to get onto the path of, a hopeful road of healing for you and the other party.
Before you get started with learning how to write an apology card, please read through these vital bullet points so you can make your apology right.
- Accept that you have done something wrong, and learn what behaviors you need to work on/change.
- Know that an apology is necessary, but that doesn’t necessarily mean the hurt party member will forgive you right away.
- You cannot force someone to forgive you, but you can use your words and actions to show them the remorseful person you are and provide proof that you’re worth forgiving.
“Apologizing does not always mean you’re wrong and the other person is right. It just means you value your relationship more than your ego.”
–Mark Matthews
How to Start a Sorry Card
Having a heavy heart full of remorse and guilt can make it difficult to know how to start a sorry card, but it’s actually easier than you may think.
- Mentally before you start writing your apology card, place yourself in the shoes of the person to who you’re apologizing. How would you feel in their place? Now go forth to write the apology card they deserve.
- State your purpose for the apology card. Admit your fault, and express a sincere and deep apology for your actions/words.
- Early on, you should express that this apology card is not time-sensitive and that the hurt party member deserves to take all the time they need to heal and process.
Apology Card Checklist
Take a look over this apology card checklist to ensure that you’ve included the vital ingredients to a sincere apology for your apology card. Customize and use these list items to best fit your situation!
- Acknowledge what you’ve done wrong, and provide information about what you’re going to do to change your actions and make things right.
- Be sure that your dialogue translates that the receiver’s feelings are valid and you respect them.
- Use words and language that are sensitive to the hurt party member, and do not use excuses or blaming in your apology.
- Write in your apology that the receiver may take all the time they need, and they do not owe you an apology.
How to Apologize with a Card
Apologizing with a card can be an excellent way to extend your remorse in a non-intrusive way. It can also be the start of the healing process for yourself, as writing down our thoughts and feelings is incredibly therapeutic.
Sometimes a hurt person needs their space and doesn’t want to be confronted (right away) by the person who hurt them. Writing an apology card and mailing it to the hurt party member can be a way of respecting their space and being able to give them time to process and respond if they so choose to.
You should also remember, for yourself, that there is a difference between asking for forgiveness and admitting you’re in the wrong and coming off like you deserve to be forgiven. Forgiveness takes trust, respect, and time. Giving the hurt party member space and time is essential.
Apology Card Messages
We’re all human, and mistakes and lessons are bound to happen dozens upon dozens of times in our lives. Learning how to apologize is a tool you’ll be very thankful to have in your life toolbelt. You can begin by reading through these example apology card messages and seeing how you can write your own apology to the person you’ve hurt.
- “Saying I’m sorry does not begin to paint the picture of how extremely remorseful I am. So I am going to show you with my actions, words, and follow-through how incredibly sorry I am for hurting you. You did not deserve this outcome, and I am going to do everything in my power to make things right. Not because I want you to forgive me, though I hope to earn that forgiveness from you, but because you deserve an environment that is safe and better than what I’ve done to you.”
- “I am so deeply sorry for my actions that have led to the pain you are feeling. I take full responsibility, and I am going to do everything it takes to earn your trust and respect back. You deserve better, and I am going to work hard to show and provide that to you.”
- “You do not owe me your forgiveness, and that is not the purpose of this card. Its purpose is to express to you how terribly sorry I am and explain the steps I’m going to take to change and clean up the mess I’ve made.”
- “I take complete and full responsibility for the pain I have caused you and the chaos that has risen from the mistakes and actions I’ve made. There is no excuse, I need to be better, and I am going to do better. You deserve to take all the time you need to heal and process, and you do not owe me any forgiveness unless I have earned it. And I intend to show you the changed person I am with corrected actions.”
Apology Quotes
Whether you have experience being the bigger person or not, or you need some guidance on the high road, take these Apology Quotes and use them as inspiration to get yourself into the mindset of writing your apology card.
Friendly tip: You can also remember a time when someone hurt you and apologized; what made you feel compelled to forgive them, or perhaps not forgive them? How can you implement those important factors into your apology?
- “Saying ‘I’m sorry’ is saying ‘I love you’ with a wounded heart in one hand and your smothered pride in the other.” -Richelle E. Goodrich
- “Never ruin an apology with an excuse.” -Benjamin Franklin
- “Please forgive me for what I said when I was at war with myself and projecting onto you.” -Unknown
- “There’s a small window of opportunity to apologize sometimes after you’ve terribly wronged someone. It closes. Sometimes forever, but it never opens wide enough again for a good breeze.” -Darnell Lamont Walker
- “An apology is a lovely perfume; it can transform the clumsiest moment into a gracious gift.” -Margaret Lee Runbeck
- “We are much more useful to the world in forgiving ourselves than hating ourselves.” -Atticus
- “A sincere and warmly-expressed apology can produce the same effects as morphine on a suffering soul.” -Richelle E. Goodrich
- “Apologies only account for that which they do not alter.” -Benjamin Disraeli
- “Clementine settled for two words, “I’m sorry”, she said. She meant I’m sorry this happened. I’m sorry I didn’t see you were going through this. I’m sorry I maybe haven’t loved you the way you deserved to be loved. I’m sorry that when we faced our first crisis it showed up everything that was wrong in our marriage instead of everything that was right. I’m sorry we turned ON each other instead of TO each other.” -Laine Moriarty
- “I feel so ashamed that I showed my worst side to the best thing that has ever happened to me.” -Anonymous
- “Sacrifice is at the heart of repentance. Without deeds, your apology is worthless.” -Bryan Davis
- “Apologizing is different from begging, it doesn’t change your status, go ahead and get on your knees, spill tears if you got it, for the person you offended, if at all you had a place in their hearts, you’ll be totally forgiven and accepted.” -Michael Bassey Johnson
- “A stiff apology is a second insult…. The injured party does not want to be compensated because he has been wronged; he wants to be healed because he has been hurt.” -G. K. Chesterton
- “Just say “I’m sorry.” It’s not a tongue twister. It does not need repeating multiple times. The phrase is simple and short, easy to articulate. And the last time I checked, it sounded just as good—if not better—in a whisper. So just say it; say “I’m sorry.” -Richelle E. Goodrich
- “I am so sorry to all the people I hurt while I was hurting.” -Unknown
- “If an apology is followed by an excuse or a reason, it means they are going to commit same mistake again they just apologized for.” -Amit Kalantri
- “’I’m sorry’ won’t fix what’s been broken. It can’t reverse time or undo the damage or change anything that happened. But a sincere, humble apology can serve to soften the sting and sometimes do a pretty good patch up job.” -Richelle E. Goodrich
- “The most important trip you may take in life is meeting people halfway.” -Henry Boye
- “Pride and ego makes a mockery of an apology. Humility wins forgiveness without question…so break ‘yo’self’!” -T. F. Hodge
- “Take your time, don’t worry. I’ll wait forever, if that is what it’ll take for you to forgive me.” -Unknown
- “Apologies are great, but they don’t really change anything. You know what does? Action.” -Stella Young
- “Never believe you’re so great or important, so right or proud, that you cannot kneel at the feet of someone you hurt and offer a humble, sincere apology.” -Richelle E. Goodrich
Now that you know how to apologize with a card, you can begin your journey of sincerely apologizing to the person in your life who needs it. Remember that apologizing isn’t a sign of weakness; it is the sign of a human being who wants to do better for those around them.